Warning. This is a rant and I use some very unladylike language in it. I’m only posting it because I know I can’t be the only one feeling this way. If my anger and grief helps you express yours, I’ll be glad.
So I finally hit the wall today.
Hard. I’m burning with a white hot rage.
It’s been coming. The truth is that I’m furious ...absolutely furious. And sad. So completely sad. I’m terrified for everyone I love. There’s not much I can do though except let my world get smaller and smaller because I have to respect the rights of absolutely ignorant “ no maskers” who need to have their “comfort level “ and “Freedom” with this virus be respected.
I have to allow my own home state of #Ohio be infiltrated with white men and women with guns who are “ fine people” to scare our lawmakers enough that they fold on doing what’s right for all of us. ( Here’s pointing all my fingers at you #MikeDeWine)
That’s like allowing smokers to smoke all around you and not have to be responsible for their secondhand smoke fouling your lungs.
I hate having to ask everyone I spend time with who they’ve been with and who those they’ve been with have been with. It feels so crappy yet it’s necessary so none of us end up sick when we’re all trying to be so careful. I hate not feeling comfortable going places I’d love to go, because those who are actually going to those places aren’t being careful or even worse, not wearing masks and flying Neo Nazi flags... yes that’s happening here in Ohio on the beaches.
I’m a mother. I conceived and birthed a son and I’ve been married for almost 40 years. I’m not losing either of those men or my precious daughter in law to stupidity. I didn't go through 9 months of pregnancy, 20 plus years of raising that child and 21 hours of a painful and practically out of my body experience of labor to lose my child because some of you can't be bothered to follow some simple rules.
Wear a Mask. Social Distance. Wash your hands. Don't touch your face. Why is this too much for some of you?
If you’re a wife or a mother too, you should be just as alarmed as I am.
Let that fire grow in your belly.
Remember your ancient power.
THEN USE IT.
I hate walking ten feet away from people I know and love simply because I don’t know who they’ve been in contact with. I hate that so many are seemingly so self centered that they’re not willing to take on this effort to protect all of us for this short amount of time.
I mean, I can’t even get some friends who absolutely know better to pull their masks over their noses. So I stay away from them and I’m seen as an alarmist.
I really resent all of you who have decided that the single biggest worldwide threat to our health and well-being besides climate change that I’ve seen in my lifetime is just something we should all just get and get over.
You get this virus and pass it around asymptomatically and watch your mother or grandmother die because you couldn't be bothered to wear a mask.
You find yourself or a loved one on a ventilator and tell me if it was worth your fucking “freedom “ or if your holistic magical thinking worked to boost your immune system against a virus that no one currently has any natural resistance to yet.
I hate that I’m seen as a neurotic and paranoid person because I’m being that vigilant. I’m not either of those things.
I’m angry and I’m afraid, which I think is a pretty healthy response given the level of stupidity and selfishness that we have to encounter everyday.
Covid- 19 is singlehandedly the most dangerous thing we’ve faced in my lifetime... why wouldn’t I be vigilant especially when an enormous part of the population is practicing really unsafe behavior. Why wouldn’t I be vigilant and even angry and afraid because we have no real leadership and in fact our President is seeking to destroy any oversight we have. Why wouldn’t I seek to change this... to protect my family in anyway I can?
Why should I be shamed for that?
I have to start at home. You do too. That’s all we can do right now while others are out and about being reckless with OUR lives.
What I have learned over the years is that when women speak up, we’re “bitchy, aggravating, paranoid, neurotic, shrill and afraid, even told that we need to get a life. Or that we're witches." “ When a man has a concern, he’s “assertive, pro-active, protective, doing the right thing for his family....”
Don’t fall for it, Women and Witches of the World. Use your power. Use it boldly. Now is the time for a truly bold show of #radicalfeminism.
My heart is just broken with fear and despair for this country and fear for my family . I’m taking this day to just be somewhat silent. I just don’t know what else to do. I can’t protest because of Covid-19. My normal channels for expressing my outrage are gone.
Forcing kids back into school so that their parents can boost the economy? Kids in cages on the border with thousands of them getting sick from Covid- 19? Pardoning criminals like Roger Stone while Black men and women are murdered by the police for 25 dollars?
I know I will move on powerfully because I always do , but right now I just need to cry and grieve. What Trump and his cronies and those of you that did and support him still have done to this country is beyond vile to me. It’s surely not American. It has nothing to do with freedom and waving around gun and bibles.
Those of you protesting mask wearing and social distancing? You look like fools and many of you may die of this illness like fools. Sadly? You’ll take innocents in your families with you. Many have already, and regretted their decisions to be reckless way too late.
I’m quieter today but trust me. The election is coming. I’ll be speaking up even louder . Better unfriend me now if you believe in Trump and his brand of white, racist , nationalist, misogynistic and ignorant governance.
You should probably unfriend me if you can’t deal with a woman’s anger too. Or if you think we should be sweet, quiet, ladylike and all of that other nonsense. There’s not a man or woman alive who didn’t come out into this world through the bloody, sweaty body and painful life altering screams and journey of a woman’s labor.
There's nothing lady like about childbirth. Give up thinking how we should behave now.
It’s not the time to be silent for too long. ( I tried, but I couldn’t even do it for five minutes. )
We are all one tribe. Yes you can share this, but better yet, write your own.
Triple Goddess Picture- Photographer unknown